Most of the time, because of our need for validation and appreciation, we wish to be accepted in society. A totally natural and normal thing. The problem arises when we forget to take care of our needs and desires just to meet the standards of society. A society full of prejudices, which will criticize and judge our choices, our lives, until we become only mere puppets.
Out of the fear of not being ridiculed or unimportant, of looking incapable or weak. Out of that we believe that what others say that we should do is natural. No, it is natural to do what makes us happy and brings peace to our souls. As long as we do not affect the happiness of others and we do not limit our freedom, our choice of what we want to do with our own lives, how we want to live and after our principles guide us, is strict.
We hide our opinions to look perfect in front of the people.
People who are not even important in our lives, who do not know us in essence. Who do not know our experiences and emotions. Society will never be near us to hold us tight in its arms every night, or to wipe away our tears and relieve our pains.
The beliefs and norms that we see in our parents will define us later as adults. But it is strictly our responsibility and choice whether or not we want to change some standards that harm us and prevent us from evolving. Parents are no longer guilty of the decisions that we take when we grow up.
People have distinct ideals of life, and their evolution is different.
I hear more and more relatives or acquaintances who are not interested in their own lives, full of frustrations and traumas because they cannot be happy. They choose to control the life of their children, instead of guiding them through knowledge and emotional discovery. Statements like, “But when are you going to get married and have children? It’s time.” They are becoming more and more common among the elderly.
People who should help us find happiness in the things that we want.
Whether you have a child or a husband, it was just your choice. It does not mean that your children should make the same decisions and do the same things. What might make you feel fulfilled and happy will not make the one next to you feel the same.
People have distinct ideals of life, and their evolution is different. It’s a totally natural thing, but one that is most forgotten or overlooked. They fail in front of those who are too scared to listen to their soul and intuition, to the detriment of
those who, frustrated by their own unhappiness, do not allow others to live as they please.
Well, dear ones, not everyone can be a parent.
Women who passed over a certain age are often seen as having fun and being disinterested in the family, just because they chose not to have children and not get married. Well, my dear ones, not everyone can be a parent. Not everyone can be able to give infants time, care and attention, be patient and not be distracted by daily stress or unpaid bills when the child’s soul will only need his parent’s love and affection.
A child who is not given the attention and affection they expect from the people he or she trusts the most will feel abandoned and rejected by parents. Thus developing emotional trauma and frustration that he or she will internalize. The kid won’t know how to free himself.
Not everyone wants a boring and common wedding
A wedding where you are too blinded by stress, by expenses and by satisfying the pleasures of all the guests, thus forgetting to pay attention to the person with who you have decided to tie your destiny to and importance of the wedding day, the day which is supposed to be one of the most beautiful days from your life. If you are going to have a wedding just because all your friends did or because your distant relatives say it and you want to be among the people, you will get a wedding that will greatly exhaust you. Why? Because you will want it to be perfect, you will want to please every guest. And it might be perfect, but certainly not for you, but for the others.
We are in an ongoing rush to make as much money as possible.
Most young people go to college, and then go for the jobs that offer them the highest salaries and most important roles. Those often being imposed by the parents who are too skeptical. By the relatives who are too distant to truly know them, or by the friends who are too caring for their own good… And then we hear the adults complaining that they are too tired. That they lack in motivation and are too stressed because of their demanding and boring jobs, because of the stress and effort that is put in their work.
Why? Precisely because we choose to do what we dislike. We don’t choose to do something we are passionate about and something that makes us happy. We want to show others that we are good, capable. So much that we put immense pressure on our mental and physical health. We forget to take care of the most important things from our lives as human beings, our emotional and spiritual side.
And we want to be perfect in front of society, but perfection is destructive.
It has disastrous effects on the peace and quality of our lives. So, we prefer to wear masks that hide our insecurities. We do not want to look weak, stupid or incapable in front of them because that way they would bring out wounds buried too deep inside us, which would make us feel vulnerable. But vulnerability is the most beautiful treasure that any human can have. A treasure that we can expose to others without the fear of getting hurt. From our fear of hiding our imperfections and weaknesses, we hide the innocence. We hife the authenticity and the purity inside us. Thus, risking to lose every beautiful and good thing we have to offer.
Well, people can decide to live their lives according to their own desires and not to the prejudices of society. This would make us just puppets without any realization or evolution.