With Valentine’s Day fast approaching, we tend to get a little carried away. Sure, we love our partners to hell and back, but loving someone is just like baking a cake: both require care, attentiveness and patience. Just because it’s Valentine’s Day we shouldn’t lose our heads and do things to prove our love on impulse. Here are 3 things that everyone should keep in mind when it come to this holiday!
Love your partner every day, not just on Valentine’s Day
Suppose you got the car of your dreams. It’s everything you’ve ever wanted and more, and yet you do little maintenance on it and don’t do anything to stop it from getting in a worse and worse condition. It’s obvious to you that something should be done, but you can’t be bothered to act till the mandatory check-up comes around. Can that be really called being a good and responsible car owner? Of course not.
Relationship are much the same way. You’re supposed to nurture them through constant love, care and affection, not look the other way and hope one big gesture a year will be enough to keep you in your partner’s good favours. Valentine’s Day is meant to celebrate love, not an excuse to be a loving partner only once a year. Take a step back and ask yourself: are you doing enough to pull your weight in your relationship, or are you just enjoying the benefits without taking on any of the responsibilities? If it’s the latter, you may want to quickly change your ways before your partner finally gets fed up and rightfully dumps you in favor of their dignity.
A gift should come from the heart, but not the plastic one at the mall
Gifts have become, for better or worse, an inherent part of Valentine’s Day. We get it, you want to impress your lover and make them feel appreciated and cared for, but there are some things you should keep in mind even while looking for that perfect gift. Just like with any other occasion when gifting is involved, like Christmas or a birthday, your gift must hold a certain significance, namely :“I love you and I got this for you because I thought you’d like it”. “I love you and I got this for you because it’s what’s expected of me” is never something you should put into practice.
Some men have the less than inspired idea of getting their partners sexy lingerie for Valentine’s Day. Does it fit the occasion? I suppose it does. But is it really a thoughtful gift? It’s all fine and dandy if your partner is into that, but outside of these situations it comes across as pretty selfish, because at the end of the day it’s just something that will be used for your pleasure anyway, not for the pleasure of your partner. It’s the “husband gifts wife cleaning tools on her birthday” classic blunder, but for Valentine’s Days. Anything to this effect should be carefully considered before actually being made into a gift.
It could be a good idea to discuss this with your partner at some point, to know what kind of expectations they have and what they’d like. That being said, maybe have this talk at the beginning of the relationship, or at least a few months in advance. Asking your partner that a few days before Valentine’s Days may be a bit of a mood killer.
Don’t make a big deal out of it if your partner doesn’t like celebrating Valentine’s Day
Not all people like Valentine’s Day, just as some people don’t enjoy celebrating Christmas for a variety of reasons. It isn’t necessarily single people or those feeling unhappy with their partner either that may feel this way, but also those in steady, fulfilling relationships. Just like with many holidays, some people feel that it has lost its significance due to heavy commercialization, and so are put off by how hollow and repetitive it all feels at this point. There could also be some other, more personal reasons at play, such as Valentine’s Day reminding them of a traumatic event or the fact that they simply aren’t big on romance in general.
Whatever the reason, if your partner feels this way, it’s not your duty to prove them wrong and help them see the true wonders of Valentine’s Day. This is real life, not a sappy romance movie. You’ll also just make them resent it even more if you force it onto them, so that kind of defeats the whole purpose of celebrating Valentine’s Day, doesn’t it? If you want to make your partner feel special and shower them with your love an extra amount, then maybe consider waiting till their birthday, or your anniversary.
How do you plan to spend Valentine’s Day? If you’ll allow me another food metaphor, it all comes down to taste. So be sure that, while you keep all these things in mind, you don’t stray too further away from your own heart’s desires. Come what may, I’d like to wish you and your partner a happy Valentine’s Day in advance!
