Robert Waldinger talked at TEDx BeaconStreet about something especially rare. A study made by him and his researchers on 724 men studied them from their teenage years to see the secret of happiness. What makes us happy and healthy?
A survey made on people between 25 – 35 years who have been asked about their most important life goals.
Their responses showed that:
-80% of them want to get rich
-50% want to become famous
The Harvard Study of Adult Development is probably the longest study on an adults’ life ever made. With a combination of luck and consistency, the study is still ongoing, fortunately!
During the project, the researchers asked the subjects about work, about their home life and their health. They were questioned every two years about their lives. The results aren’t about fame, richness or this kind of stuff. The result is: “Good relationships with others make us happy and healthy. That’s all!”
From here, the researchers got other 3 life lessons:
1. Loneliness kills.
People who were more connected with their family, friends, and relatives were healthier and happier. They’re not the same things that we saw on Instagram’s motivational posts about “Go lonely and chase money” but they’re the proven truth. Interesting, right?
2. The quality of your relationships matters!
People who are engaged and are fighting all the time, people in relationships where there’s no affection turn out to be in positions more toxic for them than if they were to divorce. On the other hand, people who have warm relationships have a stronger immune system and are healthier from all points of view.
So think again when you keep toxic people in your life just to fill the loneliness. It’s better to be alone than to be with toxic people. However, being surrounded by positive and good persons is better.
3. Closer relationships with others protect our brains.
The study presented that old couples who know that they can count on each other are protected from aging-associated diseases. Important to notice that an unhappy engagement can lead to development of schizophrenia and other brain diseases.
Honestly, after this video I really started to prioritise my goals differently. I stopped acting as selfishly as I was (or I’m still working on that) and started to be warm with the good people by my side. I also stopped keeping in touch with people that don’t give off these kinds of vibes.
That lesson will be my favourite for a long time and, after this article, we hope that we could help you set your priorities straight.