Stop being a cave man in a restaurant

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stop being a cave man in a restaurant
stop being a cave man in a restaurant

I worked as a waiter at weddings, I was a bartender and by moving to another town I came to work part-time in a restaurant with two of my friends. Since she’s still a student and I have a busy schedule I cannot say we have seen them all. But we’ve seen enough. Stop being a cave man in a restaurant, really now.

That’s why I thought I’d come to your help with a little guide. Something small, to guide you when you call our services.

Don’t be greedy, give a tip!

I’m not going to expect a tip for a coffee or a soda. But I’ll expect it when you are 20 people who want “x” amount of dishes and “y” amount of drinks. I understand that eating in town is expensive and differs from restaurant to restaurant, but if you do not like it, I strongly recommend you to go to self-service. Surprise! We are not paid incredibly well! As for my colleagues at the bar, they are there from 8 AM to 10 PM (sometimes they also work overtime).

stop being a cave man

I can’t count how many times I worked overtime. (unpaid)

Why? Because we had reservations outside my program or because right when I had to go home the restaurant got full.

Oh, yeah…, did you know that we must eat too? And we do it on the run.

We are not social cases, but…

We clean up after you, we try to make your experience as pleasant as possible (although perhaps we do not feel very well), we try to meet your requirements (although some are absurd or downright idiotic). And we do all of this with a pleasant attitude and smiles on our face.

Yes, if your offspring commits harakiri in the restaurant I have already imagined it about 3 times hitting his head against the corner of the table and I liked it every time.

But I give candies to good kids who did not give me any trouble.

And yes, I am looking deeply into your eyes because I am trying to convey subliminally that you should look at her. Especially when the place is full and I have orders to carry.

I understand it’s frustrating that you cannot get out of town because you have a child. At least my mother stopped eating in town when my sister was little. But if problems arise, I am held accountable, not you. I do not have a problem with the noise. I’ll even give my phone to him to play something as long as he doesn’t bother me. For example, one evening, I had a lady who let her offspring run around and all the tables were occupied.

So I had to move quickly with a time bomb wrapped around my legs.

A bomb that slammed my kitchen door in my nose or my back and was toppling the pots. Moreover, with a glass case at the bar, the bomb threw herself into the window. Sounds awesome, right? And the lady didn’t give any tip even though the table was full.

I will remember her as long as I live. I never really wanted to throw out a child until then.

There are alternatives, like a babysitter or you arrange something with your friends to take care of the child for a few hours. Once again, I have no problems with those little ones, but with those little ones that bother me while their parents are quite and ignorant at the table.

No, I don’t know what you ordered last month and it would be nice to realize that you are not the only client.

The possible scenario, in this case, is: you come and tell me you want what you ordered on day “x”, I apologize (sometimes I explain that we had other orders and I can’t remember what each customer ordered and when) and I’ll ask you to tell me what you want. You can: be a nice guy, understand me and tell me what you want -so that we both have a pleasant experience, or be a big dork and blame me- in which case I promise you I’ll find out where you work and come to do the same thing with you.

Yes, there are people whose orders I can memorize. Those are my boss and his family.

I know how they want their coffee to be, how they want a certain type of food, but it goes without saying that these people eat almost daily there and they know. For the rest of you, please specify to me if you have more complex requirements. It’s ok for as long as you communicate, I serve you with pleasure.

Want to know more about communication? Check this! 

If you didn’t like the food, do you realize it’s not my fault?

The moment you realize that I just make coffee and in order to bring your food I have to go to another room, you realize I was not going to dissociate myself and teleport to prepare the food? You’re perfectly fit for a logical deduction, are you?

stop being a cave man in a restaurant

I can listen to your complaints with all my pleasure and I will pass them on, in a more diplomatic and empathic form actually, but I will do it. I’ll really bring you another plate. But if you are to yell at me I will look at you with a disgusted expression and I won’t bother to tell you anything.

Use the bathroom correctly. At the end of the day, someone has to clean up there.

We’ve seen enough of this chapter. I won’t tell you because it’s not ok. That is, really, what I’ve seen is not human, you don’t want to read it. It’s incredible what can come out of a human being. I can only tell you that I experienced the following symptoms: appetite reduced to 0, watery eyes, stomach turned upside down, PTSD so aggressive that the simple memory makes me sick.

Yes, I tried to explain to my colleagues what I had cleaned in the bathroom since I’m still shocked and I could not because I felt instantly that I was going to puke. Not cool.

You should know that I’m not the type of person who will abstain from asking you: “Hey, Kyle, this is how you shit at home too?”

Stop occupying 5 seats at the table and ordering only one coffee.

Not even glasses of water, though I know those are free. Especially if it’s full. Especially if you stay a few hours for that coffee. I understand that money doesn’t grow in trees and it’s awful to not have any, but it’s not ok to ask me for 10 refills for that glass of water unless you ordered anything else. Or that I have to bring 4 cutlery to a plate of pasta so you can all peck from it. The idea is that glasses and cutlery should be washed, you’re occupying a table of 5 when there are other people who could have ordered something and they don’t space because of you and you won’t leave any tip (logically).

It’s a business.

Please believe me that I am not a sour person, I really love people.

I am more motivated to serve them when I am treated as a human being with rights and a minimum of dignity.

We don’t ask for much, just for understanding.

Author: Iulia-Ioana Radu

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