Have you ever met a liar? But… can you even identify him? How he, looks how he expresses himself, what tics he develops or how he tries to hide? Well, if you haven’t done it yet, you can start at this moment! I studied a little, from an old passion, the behavior of liars. Here are the deceitful attributes of a liar. – Recognize a liar
I began with this word, “deceitful”, which I don’t want to link to the splendor of its meaning by the majority, a magical wand that breaks relationships or marriages… No, it’s none of my business. I use “deceitful” for its meaning of “not respecting the truth, the reality”.
Robert Trivers, a specialist in evolutionary biology, discovered, studied and demonstrated that humans develop a shield around lies by self-deception, which means that the liar himself believes a small or a big part of their lies, to avoid giving the impression that he is lying.
A lie can be cognitively demanding because we have to prove a truth while building a plausible truth that does not contradict anything that those around us know. This can make you a good scriptwriter or dork.
According to psychologist Aurelia Moraru, the main reasons why we hide the truth are about avoiding arguments, of convenience, avoiding inferiority complexes or not to disturb other people. Denigration, avoidance of responsibility or affiliation to bad influences are other reasons behind a lie. A lie can also be considered an omission, that is when a person “forgets” to remember an important aspect of a real occurrence. – Recognize a liar
Signs that you… are a liar (don’t take it personally)
In “The Folly of Fools: The Logic of Deceit and Self-Deception in Human Life”, Robert Trivers explains that when we are stressed we have the habit of blinking more often. However, when we perform difficult cognitive tasks (such as solving physics problems), we tend to blink less often. In strengthening these signs comes excessive gestures or speech breaks.
However, nothing tragic so far. If you gesticulate, that doesn’t make you a liar. You can be identified as one if you don’t know how to choose your words and you lie while lying about lying. The area of ambiguity is also an accomplice to this affection and moral crime.
Look in the eyes of the speaker! If he avoids visual contact, he searches through cosmic space for answers and has fixed points while making frequent breaks of speech, he is most likely a liar. The impersonal tone, the politically place words and ambiguity keep that specter.
“We should not be upset that others hide the truth from us when we go hide it so often from ourselves.”
How do we realize that the one in front of us is really lying to us?
The suspicion can take a sensational turn when you ask for detail from the liar. I mean… wait. We still cannot declare him a liar, so we call him “an individual”. The individual can be asked to detail, repeat once again a sentence or action or to continue to speak. Practically, to make him talk. Attention! A liar will never respond to you firmly and directly. The exact answers mean thinking in depth.
We lie in an effort to create a better “version”. We lie about our achievements and skills so that others will look at us with more respect and probably, if she’s a girl, to make a conquest, or vice versa, from girls to boys, we lie to cover certain mistakes and not to be held accountable.
In other circumstances, we are lying because it makes us believe that we are not responsible for our direct or indirect actions.