Through this article, we aim to condemn the major suffering that divorce creates. We aim to put a stop to the stubbornness of not giving up a toxic relationship before kids and financial dependency appear! Divorce affects more than the two souls that sign the papers.
Some kids don’t have the warmth of a united family, where parents love each other and feel like they are the fruit of something sanctified.
Even couples that are supposed to be “till death do us part” fight during the honeymoon. However, when people with kids fight, a fight between the two of them affects others, in this case, the children. You’d be tempted to say that a little fight isn’t a reason to cry about. If we focus on the hate, aggression, and fear that float around every fight, we’ll see that the kid’s soul deteriorates. This way, they become the only reason why the two still live together.
Dear parents, you cultivate in us the idea to find someone with whom we should live “happily ever after.” You tell us that in marriage you need to make sacrifices and compromises, but you… You’re a bad example of love! You’re baffled that we’re depressed, irritable, that we smoke. That we don’t believe in love and avoid it at all costs. Even if we don’t know “what suffering is about” in love, we still won’t discuss it with you…
You’re too busy fighting each other or giving attention to possible affairs.
When you start hearing “If not for the kid, I would have already left you”, that’s when you start blaming yourself. Am I really responsible for their pain? If I wouldn’t have been born, would they have been happier? These questions mix in your soul and the blame starts chipping at you. You want to do something and stop them from yelling at each other. You would have wanted that punch to not rise and cause both physical and psychological trauma.
Then you feel helpless, nothing is in your power. Your tears won’t change anything. You don’t have the right to say anything, you can’t even enjoy existing. The moment you’re thinking it might be better, you hear the word “divorce”. Even so, you want them to be happy and you’d sacrifice your own happiness just for that smile that’s long gone. But it isn’t so easy to just throw away so many years of marriage, to build a new home without any help. If they really break up, who are you going to side with?
The worst thing on this Earth is to decide “you’re staying together…for you, our kids.”
They only do that out of cowardice, materialism or pseudo compassion. Adultery, hate, and carelessness tainted the once beautiful memory. You feed us for months only spiritual poison that we’re barely able to attend school for 6 hours. Even so, we try to not cry until the next break, when we can go to the bathroom and shed dead seas because we’re powerless. We are the “guilty without guilt” in the soap opera that God produces despite our mental health.
Unfortunately, it isn’t even an adolescent or some disgustingly cliche drama. We’d like it to be! It’s very beautiful to have on your conscience the burden of financial dependency. I’m talking about being dependent on your parents and the suffering of your martyr parent for, guess what, your fucking happiness!
Autori: Camelia Brăftălean, Francesca Bența