I know that for most of us, loneliness is a heavy burden – but I’m about to tell you about the hidden, luminous side of being alone.
But, before doing that, I must stress the fact that loneliness is often a social concept, imposed by society – I mean, we all feel great being alone from time to time and when we don’t, it’s usually because society has taught us that “being on your own is terrible, proving that you are, implicitly, a bad person”.
Of course, none of that is true – and we are about to discuss this in-depth.
Loneliness is the hidden face of independence
Being alone may seem horrible, especially when you translate that throughout the social gender requirements – you are a woman, you must have a man by your side, or you are a man, you have to be next to a woman that takes care of you and defines you.
But what people often don’t seem to understand is that loneliness is, in fact, synonymous with being independent. I mean, how can one be independent without automatically preserving the distance between oneself and the others?
Your personality needs loneliness in order to bloom
I know we are happy with people around us, and we need people – naturally, human beings are designed to better live with people around them. But the thing is we also need to be on our own, so that we can get to be able to make decisions for ourselves, to notice ourselves in the absence of other people.
It might sound sad, but people influence each other a lot – so not only it’s healthy to do things on your own from time to time, but it’s actually recommended.
Being single doesn’t automatically mean you are alone
I know we are highly influenced by social media and the social standards promoted over there, but hear me out – it’s totally fine to be single and that doesn’t mean you lack something or someone!
There is no perfect age to find a boyfriend/girlfriend, to get engaged, to get married, or have children – the perfect age is non-existent.
In fact, perfection is non-existent, so take your time to experience everything at your pace.
More than that, having friends can often be so much more rewarding than being in a relationship, therefore get used to form deep connections with your friends, so that they can know you and support you whenever you need that.
To conclude with, but actually far from exploring this very delicate topic, loneliness is, in my opinion, the feeling of losing yourself or not knowing yourself – it is rarely influenced by others since you can feel alone in a very crowded space and, at the same time, filled with softness and light when talking to a very good friend.
Therefore, I hope this little rambling helps you understand the multiple, various, and indefinite perspectives of life – which basically consist of creating your own set of rules and values and sticking to them.